Overwhelming pre-preparations

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I’ve always had a problem with patience. Its been one of my weaknesses for at least a decade. My memory retention is very bad but I really can’t remember being impatient as a child or even before I got married. I just waited things out and let things develop naturally.

So what is it with me now? Why is it that when Im SUPER excited about something, I can’t rest until I’ve got it written in black n white, illustrated in diagrams, saved and printed on hardcopy! Like when I found out I was 6 weeks pregnant I started making lists of what I needed in my hospital bag, researched every symptom and couldn’t wait to buy things.

With the house we hardly signed the contract when I started renovation plans (before it was even built in the first place) and saved pictures of potential décor ideas.

 Now Im driving myself insane with check lists again, this time making it interesting with colours!

Is it part of my OCD to keep everything in control and organized? Or am I trying to make it REAL before it can actually materialize?? Arrrrggg!

When it’s something negative that I encounter and have to figure out I always use logic and have found a way to avoid ‘over-thinking’ it by praying about it n then simply just letting go.
With something like this that I actually do need to schedule and prepare for; how do I just let it go?

… by making check lists and rechecking the check lists for anything I might have missed.

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