Time management of an Infertile


I’m very conflicted with the probabilities of conception whereby timing is a major factor.
With a regular fully functional reproductive system ones most fertile days are 14 days after your last monthly cycle started (day 1) . A fertile woman is most likely to fall pregnant should she have intercourse with a fertile male during that phase of her cycle. Even before or after that phase but mostly within.

A woman with PCOS or endometriosis wouldn’t as easily conceive due to medical complications that could be overcome with treatment but of course nothing is guaranteed.
Now there are various degrees of infertility, each with its very unique set of complications therefore it would be unfair to say one has it easier than another. I do however believe that if you have a diagnoses then at least you can plan a course of action and treatment. If you unfortunately do not have a diagnoses and land in the statistic pile of ‘unexplained infertility’ then my dear that’s just… Uncool. You won’t know why you can’t conceive and will just have to try various treatments to create a planned cycle, monitoring each phase closely, manipulating hormones here n there and striking when the iron is hot then wait.

Coming back to timing, many religious folk would say whether you stand on your head ( common advice given to infertiles) or pay thousands for assisted reproduction, your timing is irrelevant, your timing does not matter. It’s Gods decision, it’s His plan that will prevail not yours.

Yes I agree Gods plans is what will prevail but in the meantime what exactly should I do (besides pray) about this MEDICAL CONDITION called infertility. Should I have faith that everything will work out, should I really do nothing to treat this condition? Should a person with TB just pray and hope that things will be ok without treating his condition? Should a child with asthma just pray while getting an attack and not even try the nebuliser? I’ve heard that God helps those who help themselves, so I think that if you have a medical condition you should seek medical treatment ALONG with your faithful prayers. Wouldn’t the ill person be doing his body an injustice by not seeking help?

After that mouthful to digest I would like to move onto my actual contemplation. I’m all for treatment, I’m all for faith. I’m yet again stuck in limbo with the possible or improbable increased number of my spawn. As I am more of an unexplained infertile (I was diagnosed with anovulation, however I do ovulate.. I think, but just not when I technically should. Even when I ovulated on command via treatment I still didn’t conceive  My cycle is very temperamental.) after unofficially trying naturally (tracking most fertile days etc) for 9 months. I start wondering if I should consider treatment once I reach the 13 month mark.

Nothing is guaranteed, it could take another 3 years till I conceive naturally or even WITH treatment, I have no idea. Surely I should try ASAP to get my desired result but does my chance really increase if I start sooner? God is calling the shots, does my timing even matter? Your doctor could say, “sorry its impossible for you conceive naturally.” and then BAM you’re pregnant. Impossible is nothing in Gods hands. In fact just last week I congratulated a fellow infertile who lo and behold conceived completely naturally with only half a Fallopian tube. It’s indeed nothing short of miraculous.

So where does this leave me and my wish to procreate? Do I seek treatment and pray for the best, or do I just have faith?

Infertility- its hard to wait around for something that might never be, but harder to let go, when its all you ever wanted. 


2 responses to “Time management of an Infertile

  1. I believe that ”God helps those who help themselves”. While prayer is important, He has made available the resources (doctors, drugs etc) to help us – whether we are talking about disease or infertility (just my humble opinion). I too was on Chlomid for a while as I was not ovulating. The process was often disappointing, but I had to keep reminding myself that God knows best. Because I was praying for His guidance and assistance, I knew that whatever happened, would be part of His plan for me – and would therefore be what was best for me.
    Good luck – making duah for you. xxx

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